My heart didn't die after all... it was in hibernation

That's the conclusion - that my heart can still beat. Probably I should rejoice at this. Never thought I can feel again.

So I wonder if it had ever actually died or I had just simply refused to open its doors and suppressed it to silence.

But alas, never thought I'd open it to yet another dead end.

I guess, the happily ever after type of ending is just very difficult to find and one really needs to put in a lot of effort to find it.

I've been said that I have high expectations but I just want to find something or someone who'd make my heart skip a beat now, then and forever. I've met nice guys, great guys but some times, they just don't give me that butterfly in the stomach feeling. It might be unrealistic or overrated and maybe, not everyone gets to have her prince charming but I just want to have that, even if it is for a short while.

However, sadly, every time I do get that, the other party would turn out to be so wrong for me. But I know I don't want to settle.

I want to find my romance and hopefully hang on to it for life. I want to feel my heart and stomach do somersaults each time he is around.

Guess, I will just have to keep trying.

"Emotionally: I thought I was done. Mentally: I was drained. Spiritually: I felt dead. Physically: I could still smile"